Decisions Made In Time
by Weaving in Words
Summary: When Merlin reveals his Magic, Arthur has no choice but to decide. But are quick decisions made necessarily the best ones?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello everyone. I know there are plenty of these but I thought I'd give it a go too.**

**Just so you know, I don't own Merlin (unfortunately).**

**Enjoy!**

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"Were you Dragoon the Great?"

"Yes, but -"

"Then you killed my father."

"I did no such thing!" His servant exclaimed, hurt reflecting in his eyes. "It -"

"You have committed treason." The King exclaimed sharply.

"No! All I have ever done is help you."

"Sorcery is punishable by death, something you should be aware of"

"I had no choice!"

"Lies! You knew the punishment and still you defied me!"

"I was born with magic!" He shouted, before his whole energy went out of him and Merlin slumped in defeat. "Arthur, I -  
I've been able to use magic since as long as I remember. My mother told me that she found me levitating objects hours after I was born."

Arthur's eyes narrowed further. "Then why are you here?"

Merlin gazed at him with such incredibility it made Arthur wonder whether he should have known the answer.

"To protect you, you bloody prat." He said. "All I have ever done is protect you, and I will continue to protect you, if you let me, till the day I day."

The silence between them grew longer and longer, creating a drift between the two men who had considered themselves brothers.  
In the room remains of shattered glass lay about, among with the crumbled marble and fallen swords from the previous battle.

"I'm afraid I can't do that." Arthur spoke regrettably.

"Why?"

"Because I no longer know who you are Merlin. Are you the fool? The wise man? Now you're suddenly the most powerful man to have ever lived and yet you acted as my servant. Who are you Merlin? I have no idea any more."

"I am all of those things. The fool, the wise man, but most importantly your friend."

"Then why didn't you tell me?" If his eyes didn't betray his hurt, his voice certainly did.

"I wanted to Arthur. I really did"

"THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU? I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE THE ONE PERSON I COULD TRUST, AND -" Arthur's voice broke off.  
"You lied to me."

Arthur paused before continuing. "Merlin, I am afraid that I no longer require your services."

"What?!" Merlin's pale face were covered in tears. He had always known that this day had come, but he had always hoped it would turn out right. After all, wasn't he the Emrys destined to create the peace of Albion with the Once and Future King?**  
**

"You heard me. Now leave. I never want to see you again."

The Warlock stared at his previous master for a couple of moments.

"Arthur -"

"Go! You are no longer welcome here!"

And with that, Merlin fled, dragging his heavy heart with him. He was not the only one who had troubled dreams that night.

**TBC...**

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**I hope you liked it, and feel free to criticize/correct/ask questions or whatever.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello Everyone! I would like to apologise for the delay in publishing. The reason for this was because I've been feeling really under the weather lately so all of my creative spark flew right out of the window.  
The second reason is because after having so many people being interested in this (12 alerts – definitely didn't see ****that**** one coming!), I decided to scrap my original idea and post something much better.  
So thank you once again for the Reviews and enjoy! :)  
I do not own Merlin.**

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Merlin gazed wearily at the hut around him.

It was cluttered with old jars, in the corner some wilting flowers lay in a vase. Dust coated the old shelves, which looked like they might topple over at any second. It was an abandoned house, but it had served its purpose well for when he was Dragoon helping Arthur save his father. Not that it mattered _now_. Nothing did. Not even his stupid Destiny. He had been so naive to trust Fate, so stupid to think that Arthur would actually understand. Well, he was here now.

His first thought was to go to Ealdor, but seeing his mother and telling her that he'd failed was something he couldn't bear. Not to mention that there was nothing else to live for; there was no Will to distract he pain, and he knew that he would have been haunted by his childhood memories. Yes, the people were nice but some of them still treated him like a freak. Sometimes it was just better to live alone.

_Flashback_

"Goodbye brother."

Morgana Pendragon stood over the unconscious form of King Arthur, pulling out her dagger she had once received by him.

"Stop! I can't let you touch him."

Morgana groaned inwardly.

"I should have known you would have been coming. Well, I'm afraid you can't stop me."

"You're wrong."

"And why is that?" she scoffed "You're just a serving boy!"

"The Druids call me Emrys."

"You can't be. Emrys was an old man."

"Simple aging spell."

"Who's Emrys?" A voice croaked. The two magicians jumped; they had nearly forgotten about the third unconscious presence in the room.

But contrary to belief, Arthur Pendragon had in fact heard the whole exchange, and was slowly piecing together the whole information.

"Oh, so you haven't told him." Morgana's cold eyes widened in delight. "My, this is precious."

"Emrys," Smirking at Merlin's desperate plea she continued "is the most powerful man to have ever lived or will live."

_End of Flashback_

He had failed. Failed everything. Failed Gaius when he had promised that he would have been careful with his magic, failed his mother who had such high hopes for him, failed Fr- Freya who had died in his arms, her name still bringing a tightness to his throat. Failed his father who had died to protect him, failed Will who protected his secret. Failed the Druids who had believed in him. Failed everyone. He was a failure! There was no other word for it. Now all that was left was shattered hopes.

He stared at the mirror showing a young man with hard eyes, before smashing the mirror with his fist, ignoring the blood that followed.

**TBC…**

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**Hope you liked it!  
Reviews are of course, highly appreciated (hint hint). :P  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Howdy Folks! Hope you're all well :)  
I'm sorry for the long wait but hopefully it was worth it, as I present to you: The Third Chapter. (De de de dun)  
Enjoy! I do not own Merlin (but I will, just you wait :) ).  
**

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Arthur was beginning to hate the stares everyone was giving him.

If it wasn't Gwen's eyes filled with pity and understanding, then it was Gwaine's angry glares whenever he entered the room.  
Even the Knight's looks were following him more than usual.

He had managed to ignore the whispers of the servants, and act as if the hushed silences whenever he entered a room didn't bother him, sometimes having to grit his teeth in anger against the nasty comments coming from the elder council members who had disapproved of his friendship with the ex-manservant.

But the worst, the worst was Gaius.

_Flashback_

"Sire," Gaius joined Arthur once the council meeting had finished. "You haven't seen Merlin anywhere have you? I haven't seen him since last night and his bed hasn't been slept in."

Arthur tried to ignore the sound of worry in Gaius' voice, his eyes tightening and immediately looking down in an ashamed manner.

"Merlin..." Arthur did his best to look into Physician's eyes at this point "won't be joining us. He was caught recently practicing Magic. He has been banished immediately and without trial for treason against his king. I'm sorry you had to find out this way."

The effect of his words was immediate. The blood seemed to drain the older man's face and he stumbled backwards, leaning heavily against the wall to catch his breath. "Oh my boy..." he whispered, looking past Arthur with understanding.

Suddenly, something clicked in Arthur's mind. Maybe it was the fact that he had been paying more attention to details lately ever since Merlin's banishment or maybe it was because a small part (that was becoming larger and larger by the second) was growing paranoid about everyone betraying him, but either way Arthur's eyes seemed to have opened for what seemed like a fifth time.

"You knew?!" Speechless that he had been lied to by the man he had considered like a second father when he was growing up.

Gaius' blue eyes swivelled to meet his. "I knew since the very first day he entered Camelot."

Arthur looked at him, shocked.

"He saved my life, you know." Gaius added.

"I was sorting out my supplies when I fell backwards and the banister broke. Merlin had just walked into the room and had not only slowed down my fall but transported my bed to cushion my landing. A fall like that could have done some serious injury, and yet Merlin saved my life without a second thought to the consequences."

"Merlin did that... with Magic?"

"With Magic, Sire." The Physician replied, before breaking eye contact and staggering back to his rooms.

Arthur could only stare after him.

_End of Flashback_

Ever since their last conversation, the Court Physician seemed to have aged a decade, rarely smiling for anyone. He did his work, as per usual, yet there was something different in the way the he walked, and spoke. It was more distant, as though Gaius was thinking about something else entirely rather than the patient in front of him.

It was Gwen who had brought his attention to Gaius' behaviour when she had found him staring into space with a worried look in his eyes, completely oblivious to the cold around him. He wasn't even aware when she had covered him with a spare blanket and forced a mug of tea into his frail hands.

Ever since Merlin had left, everything seemed to have changed. The walls were greyer, the laughter more strained, the silences more evident.  
How can one man have changed so much?

**TBC...**

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**So... feel free to contact me about suggestions, ideas, comments, whatever as reviews are always highly appreciated. :)  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**I would like to humbly apologise for posting this up so late. **

**I wouldn't blame you if you all hated me right now, but to my defence, I did have a French exchange student last week AND a horrible IB exam to prepare for (for all those who don't know, IB is this weird equivalent of A Levels, and don't worry, I had no idea what it was either until last year :P). **

**Also, for those very observant yet sceptical few I don't why I had to have an exam in December, it's just IB for you. **

**Anyhoo, to redeem myself, I have written more than usual so I hopefully that will suffice. :)**

**Now back to the normal stuff, I do not own Merlin. Enjoy! :)**

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Autumn leaves adorned the proud, majestic trees, while a gentle breeze brought the smells of fresh pine. Nearby sounds of a gurgling brook could be heard as the Knights of the Round Table trampled on through the deep forest.

"Any signs?" Percival asked Elyan, who glanced carefully all around him before replying.

"No." The reason for the secrecy was to avoid Gwaine's ears, for after Merlin's sudden departure the knight had not only taken drinking to a minimum, but had stopped completely, and all mentions of his magical friend brought glares and taken-out frustrations on his part.

The two men shrugged and went on their separate ways, searching for clues in the dark shrubbery, ignoring the singing of the blackbird and the feeling of warmth on their backs.

"Sire! I found something!" shouted Sir Leon suddenly, pointing at some cloth to the king.

It was a red neckerchief, but Arthur would have recognized it anywhere. The appearance was tattered and torn, and in the corner mud and a sticky substance coated the fabric that looked like blood too much for Arthur's liking.

"There are some tracks leading eastwards but it's beginning to grow too dark to follow them. Sire, if I may, I suggest we break camp and follow the tracks at dawn."

Arthur nodded, still staring at the neckerchief.

His silences were one his men had grown used to, for the king never smiled anymore, and so they started setting for the night.

"Arthur." At her husband's lack of response Gwen repeated herself once again.

"We will find him." Touching his arm and staring into his face with her warm brown eyes, she tried to give him some comfort.

"What if -" His blue eyes sought out hers. "What if he hates me?"

"I'm sure he doesn't. This is Merlin we are talking about after all."

"Gwen, I've been such a fool though. I felt so angry at Merlin's betrayal I completely forgot how much he has helped us."

Gwen caressed Arthur's face with her fingers. She hesitated before carefully choosing what words to say.

"If this is the Merlin I know, he would forgive you in an instant. Probably make some joke about king prats too."

Arthur made a vain attempt to smile, but the worried crease on his forehead remained.

Gwen sighed. "Remember what Morgana said? Merlin is the most powerful man to have ever lived. Wherever he is, we will find him, and he will be okay."

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The next daybreak, the group could be found following a trail somewhere to the east. They avoided branches, stepped over animal dung, following the path before exclaiming in delight at the sight before them.

It was Merlin, a bit dirty, but looking like his usual self and sleeping soundly next a tree log. At the noise of the group the warlock sat up suddenly, his cold eyes taking in the audience around him. Without hesitation he muttered some short spell, eyes glowing gold, and pushed the surprised group away before quickly making his exit.

The knights groaned in pain before slowly standing up – Arthur of course helping his wife get to her feet. They groaned in sight of the equally enchanting presence in front of them, drawing out their swords. It was none other than the Lady Morgana.

"Oh what do you want?"

"Me? I've just come over to gloat." Morgana scoffed. "Not so powerful are we now without our precious warlock around."

"What have you done to him?!" Gwaine stepped forward angrily.

"I haven't done anything." She replied, a malicious smile on her beautiful face. "It was your _King_'s words that drove him to his madness."

Arthur gasped in pain, as memories hit him.

_"Merlin, I'm afraid I no longer require your services."_

_"I never want to see you again!"_

_"Who are you Merlin? The fool or the wise man?"_

___"I_ THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE THE ONE PERSON I COULD TRUST -_"_

_"Go!"_

'_Oh Merlin… what have I done?_' Arthur thought miserably '_Forgive me_.'

He staggered blindly through the forest, leaving everyone behind him, not caring if Morgana attacked while his back was turned. He ignored the footsteps and loud protests, continuing on his path.

The clearing he stumbled into was dark, the light not even managing to touch the forest floor. A spider's web hung over two large trees, a gaping hole in the middle of its web.

Suddenly, from the bushes a man stumbled onto the king's path. When he realised who it was, he began to run.

"Merlin –" Arthur called out, staring at his old friend intently. The warlock took paused, taking a deep breath, and slowly turned around.

For that one moment, that one heartbreaking moment, their eyes met.

For Arthur, it was like looking into the eyes of a stranger. For Merlin, it was like being reminded of all he had lost.

Neither of them spoke. They just stared.

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**So… any thoughts? Terrible, bad, tragic, okay, or interesting, whatever your thoughts I'd be glad to hear from you. Thanks for reading :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**I think once in every lifetime we reach a point where we just stop and have to question everything around us. A period of darkness while we battle our demons alone, not being able to reach out... and lets just say I reached mine.**

**It's for this reason that I haven't been publishing for a while, and for that, I'm sorry.  
Thank you if you still decide to read this, for your patience, and of course for all reviews - they really are touching. :)  
That aside, I do not own Merlin (though I wish I did).**

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_For that one moment, that one heartbreaking moment, their eyes met._

_For Arthur, it was like looking into the eyes of a stranger. For Merlin, it was like being reminded of all he had lost._

_Neither of them spoke. They just stared._

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The silence was becoming obvious for the two, as it usually had been filled with their cheerful banter in the past.

Suddenly Merlin spoke.

"I suppose you'll have to execute me now that I'm caught."

His dark eyes glazed over the King. Confusion appeared on Arthur's face as the words sunk in.

"What? No! I'd never execute you Merlin."

"And yet you didn't hesitate to banish me."

Arthur looked carefully at the man standing before him, using his hunter's eyes.  
This man was not the Merlin Arthur knew. He no longer had the bright joy in his eyes that often lit up his face, the posture of someone free and relaxed despite his status as a servant, nor the smile that seemed to twitch at the slightest thing.

This new Merlin was stooped over as though carrying a bundle of rocks; his eyes had lost their old spark and had been replaced by a certain hardness that unnerved Arthur, and even the rough tone of voice Merlin had used seemed lifeless. This figure was a man that had been completely deprived of hope.

The realisation had felt like another blow to Arthur's chest. _He _had done this.

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**This woud be longer, but Morgana decided to be evil and not coorporate... I promise to wrote some more soon.  
Thank you once again, and especially for any reviews!**


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